[0120] I Hope You Like Long Sentences
 

[0120] I Hope You Like Long Sentences

The current story arc started with this strip: Two Pieces of Cake.

This strip was inspired by the famous Penny Arcade strip I hope you like text.

  • Sandra: The gate is locked.
  • Larisa: OH NO!
  • Larisa: Now we have to wangle the keys off the old foreman of the factory, for which we’ll need the help of his housekeeper who’ll only help us if Sandra beats her in a drinking contest, which she’ll only be able to do after drinking a magic potion made of oatmeal gruel, benzoin resin and bombastium, though, the precise composition of the ingredients has to strictly follow the secret formula which a voodoo priest buried in 1926 in the garden of the White House – the one in Moscow, by the way – by the command of the barber of Calvin Coolidge inside a chest richly ornamented with runes which can only be opened by someone who’s able to decipher the clues for the solution of the complex locking mechanism encoded in the priest’s diary which is, on top of it all, in the possession of his only remaining descendant on Jamaica who’ll only be able to give it to us if we save him just in time before he gets sacrificed to Quetzalcoatl, the feathered serpent deity of the Aztecs, by a cult of radical Bob Marley fans who strive for the resurrection of their idol in a dark ritual to achieve world domination under his undead leadership.
  • Larisa: Hey, that actually sounds like fun!
  • Larisa: Killjoy.
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Discussion (48)¬

  1. Gaijin says:

        Rate this comment:  Thumb up 16 Thumb down 0

    I’m with Larisa, that DOES sound like an interesting adventure!

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  2. Tobias says:

        Rate this comment:  Thumb up 21 Thumb down 0

    No, that would be boring – what kind of quest is it if you know everything in advance? Larisa obviously read a walkthrough beforehand!

    (Nice ideas, by the way.)

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  3. mystery penguin says:

        Rate this comment:  Thumb up 2 Thumb down 0

    Lol’d @ Bob Marley part of Larisa’s long sentence

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  4. ReaperWolf says:

        Rate this comment:  Thumb up 4 Thumb down 0

    sounds good, but way tooo complicated, i like the 2nd one :)

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  5. KzT says:

        Rate this comment:  Thumb up 6 Thumb down 0

    What’s sad is that there are video games with much more complicated sequences just to pass a single part.

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  6. Random says:

        Rate this comment:  Thumb up 2 Thumb down 0

    Been playing Legend of Zelda have we?The second panel is hilarious! I LOVE Larisa’s expressions in the panels (and Cloud’s in the second), the second panel is a crazy lady foretelling of doom and destruction, the third panel is her liking her foretelling of doom and destruction, and the last panel is the scowling of disapproval of the “easy” way; her face in the third panel scares me.

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  7. Ryguy987 says:

        Rate this comment:  Thumb up 3 Thumb down 0

    Geese! You can replace her voice with Yahtzee’s (Yahtzee from Zero Punctuation) in this comic strip! How do I feel on it, it’s ok when compared to all the schlock found throughout the internet, certainly more original than anything E.A. can come up with. Even though I’ve just recently discovered your web comic, I have had enough time to read the whole thing from strip one and to be honest, it’s not really half-bad. In fact, it’s actually quite good. No where near great but it’s a decent alternative to Penny-arcade (I hate their new art style), and that’s actually a really high complement coming from a guy that commonly denounces anime style art work because most anime is the same but with very slight changes minus the occasional break of that pattern. Bottom line, I see a bright future for your comic and hope you don’t change art styles in the middle of it like Penny-Arcade did.

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  8. Lax says:

        Rate this comment:  Thumb up 6 Thumb down 2

    That girl has severe mental issues 0_0

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  9. Swifteye says:

        Rate this comment:  Thumb up 6 Thumb down 2

    I’ll have what shes having, and by “that” I mean the drugs.

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  10. Kaotik4266 says:

        Rate this comment:  Thumb up 4 Thumb down 0

    Someone should totally make that video game!
    I’m liking Larissa more and more every update she’s in.

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  11. Canuovea says:

        Rate this comment:  Thumb up 2 Thumb down 0

    I just thought about how they can use the rope… That is, getting Larissa and Cloud to the other side… Thank you Cloud’s Mom.

    Oh, and I find that absolutely hilarious…

    And no, Larissa does not have mental issues (no more than most people anyway… heheheheh…world domina… oh, er I mean, uh, hello?). What she has is an incredibly awesome imagination and a headstrong and free willed nature (nature not being something that you are born with necessarily, or at least that is how I am using it… ah whatever…). That is something many of the “great” people of the world have… even if there is a tendency towards pyromania…

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  12. slifer777 says:

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    Soooo, does Larisa just not need to breathe? I can’t say that sentence out loud without stopping a few times. Very funny :)

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  13. Someone says:

        Rate this comment:  Thumb up 2 Thumb down 0

    Damn… that is the second longest sentence I’ve ever red…
    Maybe Larissa should check her blood glucose level ^^
    And the faces really are awesome! XD Pure gold!

    @Kaotik4266 I’m on it :P … just kidding…

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  14. Xyla says:

        Rate this comment:  Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0

    Reminds me of the scooby-doo game on the sega genesis. I never did beat that carnival level.

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  15. coyoteBR says:

        Rate this comment:  Thumb up 1 Thumb down 0

    Is Larisa father Dan Brown or Stephen King?
    Great comic, enjoying it more and more.

    …but tell, are you tempted to have Cloud say “Let’s split up, Gang”, and other scooby references? :D

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  16. Tbolt says:

        Rate this comment:  Thumb up 4 Thumb down 1

    Hee, hee, did she even breathe during all that? =^^=

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  17. Kaloyan says:

        Rate this comment:  Thumb up 5 Thumb down 0

    Will someone please take the stratgegy guide from Larissa before she gives away the rest of the spoilers for this quest? Next she’ll be telling cloud the weakness of the dungeons boss monster.

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  18. Cairn Destop says:

        Rate this comment:  Thumb up 5 Thumb down 12

    Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see.

  19. Moroni says:

        Rate this comment:  Thumb up 3 Thumb down 0

    I see someone had an extra bowl of sugary cereal this morning. :)

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  20. Tahvohck says:

        Rate this comment:  Thumb up 8 Thumb down 0

    I think the most sad part about this is that the whole sentence is probably grammatically correct.

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  21. Tom Flapwell says:

        Rate this comment:  Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0

    I almost didn’t read the wall of text, but people were laughing at it, so I went back.

    About time gamers met William Faulkner.

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  22. Leak says:

        Rate this comment:  Thumb up 1 Thumb down 4

    That Penny Arcade strip got nothing compared with Subnormality’s usual walls of text:

    http://www.viruscomix.com/page497.html

    :D

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  23. bargamer says:

        Rate this comment:  Thumb up 3 Thumb down 0

    Considering that Woo is already over, they decided not to climb the wall of text, either.

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  24. Lunaroki says:

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    I’d go for that adventure Larisa just outlined, if it wasn’t for the one minor drawback that we’d never get back in time for bedtime. :D

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  25. Nia says:

        Rate this comment:  Thumb up 2 Thumb down 0

    Larisa has issues doesn’t she? But I agree, that sounds like a ton of fun! Include some exploding penguins armed with flaming chainsaws and you have a perfect day

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  26. flowerpuff says:

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    Just to let you know.. in this part,
    ” in the possession of his only remaining descendant on Jamaica”
    it should say, “in Jamaica” ;D’

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  27. Novil says:

    Random says: Been playing Legend of Zelda have we?

    Actually, it was mainly inspired by adventure games such as the Monkey Island and particularly the Broken Sword series.

    Swifteye says: I’ll have what shes having, and by “that” I mean the drugs.

    If you knew what I know you’d reconsider that statement.

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  28. Bartimaeus says:

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    Ha! Ha! So much for that idea… would have made an interesting story are, though.

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  29. tailman says:

        Rate this comment:  Thumb up 2 Thumb down 0

    Ack! The run-on! It burns!

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  30. John K says:

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    ain’t that always the way!

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  31.     Rate this comment:  Thumb up 10 Thumb down 0

    I think Larisa just accidentally wrote the plot for National Treasure 3.

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  32. Twilightfairy says:

        Rate this comment:  Thumb up 2 Thumb down 0

    Cloud in the third panel is unamused.

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  33. Ramon says:

        Rate this comment:  Thumb up 2 Thumb down 1

    i wish there were more girls like Larisa in the world

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  34. reynard61 says:

        Rate this comment:  Thumb up 7 Thumb down 0

    Oh neat! The Great Wall of Text! NASA says that it’s the only man-made object that can be seen from space… :-p

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  35. Alsritt says:

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    Good lord… Larisa is utterly, totally, and Wonderfully almostly (?) Insane. And as such, i propose that what Larisa says comes true, and they end up finding a Teleportation device. That way, they’d be fine on time.

    Other than that, the Great Wall Of Text was hilarious to read, and the exspressions were priceless.

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  36. Shippou-chan says:

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    Larissa was Yahtzee-esque… And no plot in Zelda is THAT complicated.. ONly the trading sequences even come close.

    Something like Monkey Island sounds like it though.

    CoyoteBR, I like it. Who has the flashlight, and who gets the Woo-snacks?

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  37. Iron Ed says:

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    @Twilightfairy: Cloud in the third panel is unamused.

    Sandra doesn’t look overly amused either; more kinda, “Wha..?” :-)

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  38. A.L. says:

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    ALL HAIL UNDEAD BOB MARLEY!!! Him and Zombie Jesus are homeboys.

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  39. chefcheiro says:

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    hmm… reminds me to Monkey Island

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  40. jup-reindeer says:

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    “Would you look at all that stuff …

    *inhale*

    They’ve got allen wrenches, gerbil feeders, toilet seats, electric heaters, trash compactors, juice extractors, shower rods and water meters, walkie-talkies, copper wires, safety goggles, radial tires, BB pellets, rubber mallets, fans and dehumidifiers, picture hangers, paper cutters, waffle irons, window shutters, paint removers, window louvres, masking tape and plastic gutters, kitchen faucets, folding tables, weather stripping, jumper cables, hooks and tackle, grout and spackle, power foggers, spoons and ladles, pesticides for fumigation, high-performance lubrication, metal roofing, water proofing, multi-purpose insulation, air compressors, brass connectors, wrecking chisels, smoke detectors, tire gauges, hamster cages, thermostats and bug deflectors, trailer hitch demagnetizers, automatic circumcisers, tennis rackets, angle brackets, Duracells and Energizers, soffit panels, circuit brakers, vacuum cleaners, coffee makers, calculators, generators, matching salt and pepper shakers…” – Weird Al – Hardware Store.

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  41. IndigoRei says:

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    I love run-on sentences with extreme tangent changes. It reminds me of some of the most fun conversations I have ever had.

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  42. Benji says:

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    Ya sorta lost me after the second line of text~
    It just bores me if I have to read way to much, even if it IS interesting.

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  43. Duncan Wulfweards says:

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    lol this sounds like something i’d end up doing with my avatar from Elder Scrolls: Oblivion!

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  44. Ran says:

        Rate this comment:  Thumb up 0 Thumb down 1

    Because nobody else dared:

    tl;dr (stopped after russia)

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  45. black87 says:

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    I love Larisa’s character but there is no way I’m gonna read that :D

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  46. Dawnieangel76 says:

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    Um, why didn’t Woo just pick the lock?

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  47. Roxj says:

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    o.o jamaica? but Quetzalcoatl is from mexico right?

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  48. CasualOtaku says:

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    Wow…are you schizophrenic as well as diabetic Larissa?

    Oh well, look at it this way. If undead Bob Marley takes over the world we’ll all be too stoned and trying to be peaceful to care that we’re under the rule of a zombie. As long as he’s a voodoo zombie that is. If he’s a Romero zombie we’re gonna be in deep kaka.

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