[0353] Typical Business Practices Of Internet Providers
└ posted on Thursday, 23 February 2012, by Novil
- Richard: I’m pretty sure it’s illegal to request my first-born daughter as payment for an internet connection.
- Armin Fish: It’s true that several lawsuits are pending in this matter. But we’ve won two of three trials and it’ll take several years until one of them reaches the Supreme Court.
- Richard: What are you doing with all these first-borns anyway?
- Armin Fish: Well, the fat and the scrawny are sent to do forced labor in North Korean coal mines or our call centers.
- Armin Fish: But for such a well-nourished calf, we have a much better use.
- Richard: Sandra, go to your room!
- Sandra: ?
He’s a cannibal! oh noes!!!
AckAckAck wrote:
That’s OK, my impression went back a bit farther than that: “Dewey, Soakem, and Howe!” 🙂
Richard’s Nightmare ???
@ skcusti: Bears don’t have pointy ears
Yeah… Sandra is a magnificient piece of calf…
Speaking as a father, I would have disemboweled him with a rusty spoon several panels ago. Then used the papers as kindling to set the body on fire.
@ Darth Killer:
You sure? His ears are awfully pointy…
Sandra must think her dad is mad at her for something.
Good thing this creep wasn’t around on December 8 (“Fashion Tip II”).
He’s thinking about eating her.
Not the other thing that generaly gets done to healthy girls who are sold off.
At least I hope that’s the case.
OK – I gotta say this comic is taking a turn for the creepy. I don;t even wanna know what he’s got in mind but judging from the look on his face he’s got a meeting with Chris Hansen in his near future.
You’re not afraid to push the envelope a little.
As a good friend of mine always says : “Everything can be solved with grenades!” or “When in doubt, frag them out!”
@ coyoteBR:
…but if Larissa burns the company to the ground, Sandra’s family won’t have Internet! How will they read webcomics?
@ Slimecat:
…I hate to burst your bubble but this does actually happen in parts of the United States. You may not hear about it but it does happen. I have a family member who happens to be a lawyer and he had to deal with a case that was very similar to this in the United States. Things happen within the United States borders that are actually pretty gruesome and what you consider inhumane. The truth is, companies/organizations/people pay millions upon millions of dollars to keep the media from publishing stories about these kinds of things.
@ Starkittens:
The state of the economy is tough on everyone it seems…
@ Anonymous:
TF2 FTW!
on another note, I have never liked lawyers and this guy gives me the creeps…@ Anonymous:
my only solution here is to kill the basterd!!!!
Is it just me or does the Lawyer look like a Blonde Phoenix Wright in a green suit?
It may just be because i’ve been looking up on them lately but the last few comics have reminded me of the seven deadly sins.
If this is the author’s intention then the one that started them had to be Woo’s attempts to please god, which suggests the loss of pride, the arc we’re at now seems to either be lust or gluttony, the one with Sandra failing at gym makes me think of sloth, the arc previous to that with clouds parents playing with dolls seems like wrath, the only ones i can’t see so far are envy and greed
John Willow wrote:
after reading this…..one thing on my mind….Call the Elric Brothers…
Attention everyone Attention!!!, We have ourselves a kitsune on the lose. Note the always closed eyes, the sly smile, pointed ears and teeth, his hair which looks like fox ears folded back, and the pointed mouth resembling a foxes. The preferred method of ridding such creatures is beating them with iron stove pokers till they die or run away.
Time to die, little man.
@ BeepBoopBeep:
Sadly, It is my understanding that slavery of any kind is illegal in every country on the planet. If it does happen in the United States or anywhere else it is illegal regardless of how many clauses or legal loopholes are in a contract.
Satellite companies have stupid fees attached because they have no faith in their product nor their customers. Which is why you cannot cancel their services before the contract is up without having to pay a pro rated cancellation fee until the endo of the contract period. You can read the fine print before you sign up. That is why I prefer cable. They have faith in their product and their customers and I have yet to see evidence of them hiding a cancellation fee “in plain sight” or otherwise. The only raise in prices that I have seen have been taxes incurred and passed on to customers from the Government, and even then it was less than $2 US. The fine print is there for a reason, If you don’t want to read it or cannot understand it you have the right to refuse service.
@ ecurps:
I thought he was a pedophile too. I didn’t notice him rubbing his stomach until you pointed it out XD.
@ Starkittens: Are you kidding me? It’s the most efficient way for him to work! He gets to work from home. And besides, when’s the last time you completely read an EULA? 😀
@ Slimecat:
Being illegal never stopped anything (re:drugs, alcohol, child porn, pirating dvds, etc, etc, etc) slavery still exists and buying children is a common practice in some parts of the world.
Pedo-alert! Break out the pitchforks and torches, and get your guns, people.
this is getting to absurd levels of creepy right now… i mean i know Sandra and woo hasn’t yet shy’d away from the hard topics like dead parents, human trafficking, and death squads but this arc is creeping me out on a level that I’ve never been creeped out on before… pretty amazing for art that looks like it belongs on a Saturday morning cartoon slot.
i’v watched horror movies that get less reaction from me….
@Novil
This arc is so funny. I LMAO!
@ Gamesman:
Admit it, people enslave themselves. I’m not denying a psychological component , conditioning or otherwise. However, the type of bondage you are referring to is caused by drugs, poverty, religion, fear, and special interest groups. All things which cannot be eliminated or remedied by looking at the problem and saying it exists. Or, heaven forbid, giving these chuckle heads ideas.
Furthermore, the most anyone can do free a slave is empower them to free themselves. You can provide them with tools, wisdom, and support, that’s about it. Everything else is up to them. Sorry, prosthelytizing and grandstanding doesn’t really work unless you have the power to enforce change. And, in the end, isn’t forcing beliefs, splintering fears, projecting ignorance, and conditioning another culture to meet the demands of social proof a higher power onto some body else the same thing? Technically speaking, anytime you take unfair advantage of another person you are perpetuating the same violence and ignorance as the slave masters, economists, and con artists.
Ooooh i like that guy.I hope he is a Big Bad Wolf in Disgust.
Then again…better not…since i have seen how badly this comic treated a poor Wolf.
He wouldn’t win anyway.
Mike wrote:
w
in the end i wont 🙂 Pedophiles don’t last long in a neighborhood of Wolves! 😉
Wolf in Bears Clothing (Its the last thing they’d suspect)
Ritch wrote:
dont forget to mail the ashed back to StarNet as a warning!
Wolf in Bears Clothing (Its the last thing they’d suspect)
Can’t tell… does he want to rape her, or eat her? Eh. Same outcome when it comes to ISP companies. Go ahead, go over your monthly bandwith. They’ll do MUCH more than take your first born.
I’m sorry but i don’t find this comic to be funny at all. Children trafficking is a real and serious issue and I honestly don’t feel that one should be making a joke out of it. I know the author was just trying to poke some fun at the internet company and how they tend to up the payments once you start an account with them but this is going too far.
More than likely this comment will receive multiple burns and be buried underneath a wave of trolling with comments like “you didn’t get the joke! or it’s only a comic!” I’m sorry but no, there are delicate and hot topics out there that just shouldn’t be handled like this. There is a line and I’m sorry to say the author just crossed it.
Make no mistake I normally find the Sandra and Woo comics to be funny if not flat out hilarious, but I truly feel the author could of handled this joke a lot better.
He isn’t a pedophile, he wants to eat her, get your head out of the gutter.
@ Sand Fox:
Yes that approach worked so well for the people of Elm Street.
@ Greenwood Goat:
it would go down if i was going after it! yay for insanity saving the day! who said that!? *twitches and clutches a overly large butcher’s knife*
Yeah, I’m thurgholy convinced this guy is a sexual predator. Get Chris Hansen on the phone now.
@ Slimecat:
You live a sheltered life. I clearly said “child buying” and you talk about choices. What choice did that child have? Most likely it will end up in a brothel serving customers one after the other to avoid beatings and torture while the pimp keeps all the money and barely feeds her. THIS IS REAL AND HAPPENS EVERYDAY. No amount of education will help this child. Poverty may have caused it but only a complete reworking of society, government and attitudes can really change things.
Maybe he is the Devil who offered the ice lemonade to sandra.
@ Gbaase:
He’s rubbing his belly. He wants to eat her, not rape her.
Am I the only one who thinks some of the readers of this thing, especialy some commentors, are a little uptight and can’t take a joke? (Looks back at all the valid criticisms and sex jokes I’ve made and the subsequent torrent of downthumbs) Yeah. Yeah, they are. I mean people, he’s rubbing his belly. EAT, NOT RAPE. Come on. Same thing with Fashion Show 2. Yes, she’s underage and naked. SO WHAT!? If you’re THAT offended maybe there’s something you’re afraid of… trying to hide?
Mike wrote:
I believe that’s “Dewey, CHEATEM and Howe!” 🙂 😉 🙂Mike wrote:
I believe that’s “Dewey, Cheatem and Howe.” 😉 🙂 🙂
@ Gamesman:
What’s with all this assuming he’s a pedophile??
Judging by the text, all I get from this is that he’s going to cook her and eat her, and that he’s a cannibal.
@ NightStarX:
Like I said, the quote can go either way.
Though in retrospect, he is rubbing his belly. I didn’t see that, that does make him seem more cannibal-y.
his either thinking something sexual or plans to eat her i thinks its the first and if i was him i would to mwahahahahahahahhaha
1. Trick Homeowner into giving away first born.
2. Send the Fat/meak ones to N.korea Coal mines/call center.
3. Send the fit looking girls into *censored*.
4. ????
5. Profit!!
Look at those slightly pointed ears, and the glimpse of fangs, the drooling. I’m betting either a wolf (perhaps one we’re familiar with) in human clothing, or Oliver is introducing werewolves. 😀
@ Logical:
Really? Seriously? Because speaking as a father this guy would be dead on the floor already, and that’s if I had started in a good mood.
Richard, Woo and Cloud will kill him….literally, I mean…yes they would kill him for trying to take Sandra away