[1030] Dating Tips For Boys, Part 4 Of 4
└ posted on Monday, 15 October 2018, by Novil
- Cloud: You can have a lot of fun with a cheerful girl like this. But it can also be very exhausting.
- Cloud: If you’re very introverted, this girl may be the better choice.
- Book cover: Go – History and Stories
- Boy: But I thought that opposites attract?
- Cloud: Only to a certain extent.
- Girl: Excellent move.
- Boy: Thank you.
- Cloud: A date doesn’t have to involve going to a party. A date can be anything. As long as it’s fun for both of you!
Opposites attracts is actually just a saying… There was a proper scientific research done and it was found even though opposite have a stronger first spark from time to time, similar to each other people do have longer marriages and are actually a lot less likely to divorce…
Personally, I think that opposites are more likely to work if they are opposite in a way that they complement each other rather than being opposites in a way that they have a difficult time having fun together due to lack of common interests. Granted, those two are related to each other, but not 100%. Opposites can mean many different things, it can refer to opposite skills, interests and opinions to name a few. Having opposite skills and having opposite opinions could both make a couple be considered opposites, but there’s no reason to think that those two different opposites have identical effects on the sustainability of the relationship.
So now that this is over, what’s next?
Dating Tips part 5: How to meet introverted girls that are into similar things. 🙂
These were a pretty fun take on dating tips
@ ceven:
Agreed! I liked the whole arc. 🙂 (…assuming it’s actually over now?) 🙂
Would love a follow up on how Clouds parents met. Not what they bonded over, but first face to face.
Go is fun, but I prefer the sequel game, Went
In the end though, you’ll end up chucking all this out the window and settling for whoever will put up with your crap.
@ Jim R:
Uncomfortable Truths Dinosaur Sez:
“Remember kids, everyone wants someone of the highest social status!”
Great, another comic about Go! 🙂
And a true one. I know a couple of couples who fall in love while playing Go – and now have children who play Go, too…
After setting up two train wrecks, I was not expecting this to close out with legitimately good advice.
Cloud actually giving passable advice for once? Woo!
This is some good advice, and although I’ve never played Go, I’d enjoy a date with a girl where we just play board or video games together.
Well that was a let down. ah hahahaha
It seems Cloud decided to Go out with good advice.
so this is what I got out of this
1) don’t date people who will make your life miserable
2) ignore rule 1 if the person is pretty and has reasonable standards
3) ignore rule 1 if you are desperate
4) introverts can date too
…well half of them are good advice
Good advice, Cloud!
But wait. Then it would be part 5 of 4.
error.jquery(incorrectMathSyntax).java();
@ Senjiu:Shutting down...
ADGood wrote:
It is a silent trainwreck this time, because the trainwreck is introvert :-). The advice itself is good and I do agree that you can have much fun with your girlfriend doing almost any activity together that you both love. But for a first date to get to know someone, sitting opposite each other thinking hard about a game while not talking at all in order to not distract your partner is certainly not the ideal approach.
Crystalgate wrote:
“Like attracts like” will be true most of the times. What is unfamiliar and exotic may intrigue you at first, but is not a basis for a relationship. Opposites only attract when they match each other, e.g. one person likes to talk much and the other one is a good listener and doesn’t like to be the center of attention himself. Or one partner is confident, protective and likes to take charge and the other one is insecure and likes a strong shoulder to lean on (strong shoulder meant figuratively, the confident one doesn’t have to be physically stronger and it doesn’t have to be the man, there are a lot of insecure men who like it when their more confident partner takes charge, too).
@ someguy:
Perhaps, but it is a good first start!
@ someguy:
While there are insecure men who like their partner to take charge in general women are not attracted to those types of men. It’s difficult to predict how any individual person will behave or respond to, but as a group people are much easier to predict. Women, even the outgoing and confident types, for the most part will not take initiative in their romantic endeavors.
Our esteemed comic artist understood this back in his “Dating tips for girls” strip. Insecure guys are fighting an uphill battle in that regard especially since it’s near impossible to predict what an individual woman will find attractive in a guy (even the woman herself likely wouldn’t be able to articulate what she wants; she’d probably either not have an answer or give an answer that completely contradicts her behavior).
@ Trimutius:
Even “Like attracts like” has its limits, there is such a thing as having too much in common. For example: two people who have opposing political views, but are equally stubborn and steadfast in those views. Those two would basically never get along whenever the topic of politics came up and could very easily interfere with a stable relationship.
someguy wrote:
Then why make it a “date”, with all the fears and expectations that come along for the ride? Far better to have mutual interests that allow you become friends without any pressure or acting. Friends can always morph to romantic partners if there’s mutual interest.
At least to me and my peers, this seems a rather “water is wet” observation. I’m not sure any of us ever “dated”, per se.
Some of those relationships morphed back into friendships, most of the rest eventually became marriages, most approaching 25 years, so the strategy does seem to be viable.
Senjiu wrote:
Yeah, we’re missing the two most important points here:
1) How to meet someone like Go-girl.
2) How to get to know her without scaring her off.
(Also 3) how to get to know her without scaring yourself off.)
Hands-up to Powree for drawing panel 4 and 5 separately!
Wait, actually good relationship advice not tainted with a heaping spoonful of sexism? I officially have no idea what this arc was trying to be.
Sadly, I cannot Go. My mind can’t hold all the possibilities at once.
But, as everyone above said, all of these tips are about picking the right girl, under the assumption that there’s a wide selection available. But nothing about how to get to a situation where such a selection is available, or even what to do AFTER picking the girl.
Stories taking place in school get to skim on that prior part, because, gender-segregated schools aside, you’re likely to be around girls your age there. But this just ends up reinforcing the notion that if you haven’t found your life partner by graduation, you’re going to die alone. Heck, even post-school rom-coms reinforce the same notion by having the plot rely on a completely convoluted and act-of-god level unlikely encounter.
So yeah, the real lesson from these 4 strips was: Get hooked before you graduate. If you graduated alone, just go ahead and kill yourself.
Wait a second…are you actually giving GOOD advice? That’s weird…
“Excellent move” is usually a prequel to right before she destroys you
Opposite strengths work but you need a similar morality and ideals for it to work long term. This is the best one of the 4 as its the most accurate.
It’s not about opposites, it’s about how well you compliment each other.
With a little creative interpretation I can turn a comic strip that is silly and largely unhelpful (I’m going on the working assumption that it’s just a joke) into something helpful.
1a) Avoid women who make bad partners i.e. the gold digger, the drama queen, the one track mind enthusiast, the obviously crazy
1b) No relationship is better than a bad relationship
2) Avoid women with unrealistic standards
3) Don’t listen to your crotch when your head is telling you something
4) Find something that you’re good at
5) Pick a girl who compliments your personality
Now the nature of this advice is structured such that it’s a good starting point for either gender rather than advice specific to men when searching for romantic partners. Ironically I’d say that Larisa’s advice to girls has more practicality behind it for men than Cloud’s does (be clear with your intentions, the target of your affection may be just as insecure as you, etc.)
Here’s some advice of my own: hold women accountable. Don’t put them on a pedestal thinking that they’re some perfect little angel that can do no wrong. Treat them like the humans that they are and don’t be afraid to call them on bad behavior. Set your boundaries properly and don’t be afraid to enforce them as necessary and within reason. Remember that you lose nothing from walking away from a bad relationship
While the author’s intentions and true feelings on the matter are still somewhat unclear to me I think the best take away is that we’re all human, not that different from each other, and dating is some straight BS.
blue wrote:
Well being “Like minded” is what important… not stubbornness or steadfastness…
Someone told me something akin to “you can’t appreciate surrealism” when I complained about the last couple of strips and the comic in general.
Where’s the surrealism here, huh?
someguy wrote:
That is, at worst, a train-stopped-at-the-station.
Painting in broad strokes here (and being heteronormative on top) but consider this:
1. Opposites attract
2. You can generally consider men and women to be opposite
-> Attraction!
I’m really bad at go.
I’m sure this is not in any way connected by my lack of interest at practicing and getting good at go.
But why would Paula Abdul and a cartoon Cat lie to me like that?
Finally a good tip!
@ 627235:
How do gay people fit into that?
SlugFiller wrote:
someguy wrote:
Sorry for the empty prior post, hit submit by accident.
What I wanted to say: Since Cloud is a schoolboy, he is likely to give dating tips taylored to School boys and revolving around school situations, because those are his peers and his experience. The conclusion you draw – though it is sometimes depicted this way in romcoms because seeing People score a happy relationship easily in an ordinary way would hardly be comedy material – is completely off. In real life, most people don’t end up in a long time relationship or marriage with people they met in high school. Slightly more do end up with their college sweethearts, but guess what, there are still a lot of people who don’t go to college and still have relationships. Good places to meet and get to know people who like the same activities you like would e.g. be clubs for those activities. Looking for an introvert girl who is e.g. into chess or into literature? Try joining a chess club or a book club. Looking for a girl that likes rock music? Go to a rock festival.
In the last panel she says to him, “Excellent move.” Is she referring to his move on the go board or to his move on her?
Go is a great game, I should start playing again some time.
Robert wrote:
Probably the latter. I can’t find any sign of a move on the board so his silent sitting at the table and apparent intense concentration on the board indicate that she’s impressed with his serious nature.
Northern Flame wrote:
They don’t. Neither do other complications like “reality”. That’s life.
Of course I don’t want to say that homosexuals are a complication.
They are only a minor nuisance.
*ducks*
@ BorgLord:
The only one I know who plays Go is my brother and he’s a lot better than me. What I’d need is someone roughly on my level (where I win at least 20% and at most 80% of the matches) to play with to get some practice. 🙂
Playing against people that are a lot better is too demotivating, at least for me, when it’s something I do for fun.