[0758] Poor Choice Of Words
└ posted on Thursday, 4 February 2016, by Novil
Seriously. At least football players are trying to play a game instead of randomly bumping their heads into each other like in handegg.
- Thomas: I didn’t think you’d be such a big football fan. Is it your favorite sport?
- Luna: No. I still prefer real football to American football.
- Caption: ~ DEAFENING SILENCE ~
- Spectator #1: Blasphemy!
- Spectator #2: Burn the heretic!
- Thomas: Religious tolerance has its limits, Luna, even in America!
- Luna: I’ve noticed.
![[0758] Poor Choice Of Words](/comics/2016-02-04-0758-poor-choice-of-words.png "[0758] Poor Choice Of Words")
As an American, I don’t understand why we call a sport where you hold the ball in your hands and the ball is kind-of egg-shaped “football”. I’m not really a big sports fan.
Anyone who calls it handegg has clearly never seen an actual egg. Or works on a farm with some seriously funky chickens.
Thisguy wrote:
Yep. As much as I enjoy soccer, the Australian game is everything the world game wishes it could be. WE ARE ESSENDON
Quick throw you suit on Luna~! If cartoons and comics have taught me anything, murican football fans are too easily distracted to notice a simple disguise of a change of clothes~!
@ cariad: Correction. It’s a flail. Second. Burn the heretic!! For the glory of the God-Emperor!!!
Only in America can you bring medieval weaponry to a game.
I consider Australian rules football to be the true football sport. It’s not soccer, it’s not rugby, and unlike American football, you actually use your foot against the ball frequently.
@ Angel of Death, Wake:
Your attempt seems to have failed.
SHOTS FIRED!
Ah, the american answer to everything, if we don’t like the same things like u u die!
No wonder i never went there on vacation..
Though the question is Luna is American would she not have called it soccer?
The parents of the little girl with a flail should be ashamed. It’s unsafe to use a flail with a longer ball and chain than handle, you could easily hit yourself on your arm with it. They should have given their daughter a safer flail.
Anyway, maybe American Football should be renamed to “Handegg”?
It’s called “Soccer”, kid. Get it right. 😛
This reminds me of Canadian Bacon.
I must mention though that the morning star in hands of that girl is a rather dangerous design, chain must be shorter than handle so you don’t end up hurting your hand.
In Comedians In Cars Getting Coffee by Jerry Seinfeld the comedian Trevor Noah said something about this.
What is the biggest event of american football? The Superbowl. How many people watch it in a good year? 100-150 million people.
A regular match Real Madrid vs FC Barcelona in the middle of the season is watched by more than 400 million people.
So, by the principles of democracy our football is the real one.
@ Tucci:
Oh, you mean a sport that has literally crippled bigger men than you? A sport that leaves many of its players unable to even exhibit basic bodily mechanics because it destroys their brains and spines? And you want your kids to play that? Sometimes the “nanny state” make really good points, and perhaps the machismo could do with a little less pissing and a little more thinking.
My favorite two quotes on American Football:
“I find it amusing that a nation which prides itself on its virility feels the need to strap on forty pounds of protective gear simply to play rugby.” – Rupert Giles
“Football combines the two worst qualities of American life: Violence and committee meetings.”
@ Lucy:
I’m with you here on this one.
2 1/2 inches of padding? Nah, give me a t-shirt.
My face is bleeding? That’s just weakness seeping out, carry on!
@ Pi Man:
BURN THE AMERICAN!!!
MaxArt wrote:
Yea, really, the sport’s content aside, what’s up with that? The naming sense just defies common sense so badly!
Then again, the US seems to have a thing with troll conventions. I mean, they’re randomly calling leftists “liberals” and… holy hell, I just opened a page on US customary units. What is this I don’t even
Vandroiy wrote:
Please go back to page 1 and read the comment I left. Also, your comment is basically just bitching about things without even bothering to take the time to learn about how they work.
Honestly, you talk about the term “liberal,” but “left” is entirely arbitrary. Liberal is a far more descriptive term when it comes to political stances. And then you talk about US customary units when these were the measurement standards used all over Europe until relatively recently.
Made my day! Thank you
Novil wrote:
Have you ever seen that Simpson’s episode where they caricated a soccer game? Basically, they showed a few players in the midfield who passed the ball around without anyone getting anywhere near any goal. (And yes, not all that players were from the same team).
Renadt wrote:
Well, not that much bigger than I am, even now. I’m down quite a bit from my playing weight, but you have to remember that kinetic energy equals one-half mass times velocity squared, and those of us who are very big and start each play in the three-point stance don’t usually get up to high rates of travel.
It’s the guys who are smaller than I am who’d go crunch! when we made contact with ’em. I never got to do all that much in the way of downfield blocking, but defensive backs were so much fun to hit.
cariad wrote:
i know, right? I was gonna say :>
American football, also known as “handegg”. So yes real football is better.
@ cariad:
No, that is a Morning Star, a type of flail.
Why my fellow Americans could not come up with a unique name for a sissified variant of rugby I have never understood…. Nor where the hell the term Soccer came from. Only the kicker in “football” uses his feet on the ball.
If you took the best American football team, removed their pads, gave them little leather helmets and put them against a decent rugby team they would likely need an entire year to recover from their injuries.
Bring back the gladiators. Christians versus lions? Now there is a sport I would watch!
Yea, not really much religious tolerance going on in America at the moment
@ cariad:
And no that is a morning star. A mace does not have a chain. There is another blonde with a spiked cudgel, which again is still not the same.
Religeous tolerance? That’s still a thing?
Lantheria wrote:
It resembles an egg more than it does a ball. Heck, an egg resembles a ball more than a football does!
Well, I can understand the crowd (European) football is boring, the players are constantly cheating (either making illegal moves and fouls or acting hurt and stuff; it really is more a modern form of theatre…)
I like rugby, though.
Just for clarity, by “real football” did Luna mean soccer? There are other varieties of football (e.g. Australian or Canadian) that someone might consider “real football”.
Most American football fans would react to someone saying they prefer “real football” by saying, “This is real football!”. Had she said “soccer”, they would have understood her.
P. S. Only wusses need four downs. : )
DonJuan wrote:
The God Emperor doesn’t burn heretics, though sometimes he crushes them when the Worm takes control.
@ The J.A.M.:
How about a nice game of chess, then?
@ Archerb:
Everyone knows American football is Rugby with lots of sissy padding
Invented by a Brit because you Yanks kept getting hurt, maybe Walter Camp should of suggested wrapping the players in cotton wool
shazz_smifff wrote:
of course their both games played by men with odd shaped balls
Aaawwwwww, they’re bonding over football.
And running away from a torchweaving mob.
That’s so cuuuu~ute.
They’re gonna go medieval on their ass.
Not surprisingly, the word fan (in this case sports fan) comes from the word fanatic.
Great way to end a date, I think
@ Bmanmax:
Sadly, there’s doping in professional chess as well. Players are trying to see how much of over-the-counter calming drugs they can take before a match in order to NOT become nervous and continue thinking clearly.
Fact: In Italian, “soccer” is called “calcio” = “calcium”. Don’t ask me why.
I first saw an American Football game when I was 5. It was the Miami Dolphins against…….someone else.
THE ONLY THING THAT THE PLAYERS DID was just crouch in front of each other, and suddenly rush forward and fall into a big pile.
Then they reset…and did the exact same thing.
Then they reset…and did the exact same thing.
Lather, rinse, repeat, for the next 3 hours.
So, yeah, even now, I consider American Football to be on the same boredom level as golf or cricket.
Handegg? Don’t be silly, it’s played on foot, not while walking on your hands! It’s footegg at most, and nothing really specifies that a ball *has* to be round…
@ MaxArt:
THANK YOU.
REMOVE HANDEGG YOUR WORST FOOTBALL. REAL FOOTBALL IS BEST FOOTBALL
Meh. I prefer Martial Arts anyway. Of course, I wouldn’t say so packed amongst so many fans.
“Why did all you people bring medieval weapons to a football game?”
“Shit, why WOULDN’T we?”
Draygone wrote:
Yes, but “handegg” is too delicate, and “manipulated oblate spheroid” is to nerdy.
Of all the religions in the US, it’s the Church of the NFL that takes heresy the most seriously.
Everything went as expected.
http://i1.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/newsfeed/000/732/170/796.jpg
The J.A.M. wrote:
<blockquote
Fact: In Italian, “soccer” is called “calcio” = “calcium”. Don’t ask me why.
nope, is called “calcio” = “kick”
@ Novil:
Good sir you delight me with your sinister wit.