[0874] Under A Killer Balloon: Gone Girl, Page 3
└ posted on Monday, 3 April 2017, by Novil
- Sandy South: The case is crystal clear, Qoo!
- Qoo: It is? Well, yes, I guess it is.
- Sandy South: The girl was last seen in Tony’s Pizzeria. That’s proof that she’s currently being held in the pizzeria’s basement to be sold as a slave to an oil sheik!
- Qoo: Absolutely sound reasoning.
- Sandy South: Come on, Qoo. We have to save the damsel!
- Sandy South: Oh, it’s open…?
- Qoo: I have a bad feeling about this.
- Sandy South: Silence, Qoo! We–
- Sandy South: Is that a crying girl?
S&W in German/auf Deutsch
![[0874] Under A Killer Balloon: Gone Girl, Page 3](/comics/2017-04-03-0874-under-a-killer-balloon-gone-girl-page-3.png "[0874] Under A Killer Balloon: Gone Girl, Page 3")
I really like Qoo. Still not sure how to pronounce that though.
Woo has a good reason to have a bad feeling, they are committing burglary. The crying girl doesn’t help things either, it makes things rather creepy considering Sandra’s statement in panel 2.
So is Sandra looking for Sandra? Or is another Sandra looking for Sandra? Or is Sandra looking for another Sandra? Or is this all a conspiracy?
It saddens me that future readers years from now may trawl through the archive and miss the pizzagate reference as just another bit of random comedy absurdism. Blissfully ignorant to the extent people can convince themselves of a conspiracy.
@ Crystalgate:
Burglary requires both unlawful entry and intent to commit a crime. In this case, they were just going in to look around, which would be trespassing at worst.
@ Xezlec:
I’ve been pronouncing it “koo”, but I can never be sure of authorial intent. Maybe it’s like Cthulhu – all pronunciations vaguely resembling the text are correct.
@ wyzwon:
What’s pizzagate?
Onihikage wrote:
Maybe it’s like Hastur: you know you get the pronunciations correct when your head explodes.
@ Jihadi Jon:
One of those things you’ll wish you didn’t know about once someone tells you.
But Sandra is going to find an actual kidnapped girl down there, isn’t she?
Well April 1st has come and gone. I was hoping this was some elaborate April fools joke but I guess it’s canon. Well if it isn’t April fools then it is just absurd and wierd and totally something sandra would do. I look forward to the end.
Breaking the universe in 3…
@ Xezlec: Yrp, second panel, biting sarcasm,and the look, just perfect.
@ showler:
Not just a kidnapped girl, Sandra North! Haven’t you been paying attention?
Jihadi Jon wrote:
During the 2016 election a RWNJ made up whole cloth that Sec. Clinton was running a child sex ring out of the basement of a pizza. [Which was then spread but the Russian bots and a few others] the in December Edgar Maddison Welch self deputized himself with and assault rifle to investigate. He opend fire, luckly no one was injured
Note the named pizza place did even have a basement,
roguebfl wrote:
Epp! Didn’t even have a basement I mean
Given what’s come to light over the last year I’m with Sandy on this one. A pizza place can end up being the perfect cover for a child sex trafficking ring, hopefully she and Qoo have better luck shutting it down.
@ roguebfl:
What’s an RWNJ?
Squirrelmaster wrote:
Right Wing Nut Job
@ Crystalgate:
Technically not a burglary since they haven’t stolen anything. It’s not breaking and entering either since they didn’t break anything, so just trespassing…(unless they know the owner and are just visiting before or after hours)
@ Jihadi Jon:
It was a conspiracy theory that started during the US election out of all the email leaks. The allegation was that the friends and business partners of some known/convicted child molesters and traffickers were involved in additional molestation or trafficking, with a specific pizza parlor one of them owned acting as some sort of hub.
Also, as if that wasn’t outlandish enough, the “evidence” was even more fanciful. Meaningless stuff like oddly worded emails. And silly pictures some of them posted on their instagram pages, like a child bent over a table with her arms taped down while a man stands behind her. And those police witness sketches for child abductors that coincidentally perfectly match the faces of two of the accused. And that thing where the logos and artwork of the business involved accidentally contained nearly every symbol from the FBI’s document about symbols and iconography pedo networks use to communicate. And so on and so forth, one meaningless coincidence after another.
You know, just another one of those crazy conspiracy theories. Even less plausible than “JFK got shot”.
Oh, good. I see people with no clue are answering a question about this.
@ Jihadi Jon:
Hillary Clinton is surrounded by people suspected or confirmed to be involved in pedophilia and sex trafficking. Of note:
1. Top aide’s husband, Anthony Weiner, was arrested after sexting a 15 year-old. Let’s just say this didn’t exactly come as a shock to quite a few people.
2. Her own husband took >2 dozen trips to Epstein’s “pedophile island,” including many where he left behind his secret service protection.
3. John Podesta’s favorite artist is famous for pictures of children in distressed situations, and recent leaked audio of a child being tortured seems to contain his voice, and the torturer is referred to by both John and Skip (Skip being a nickname Podesta uses to describe himself when he’s worked himself into a rage, as the torturer was in the audio).
4. This one is a little harder, because I don’t remember her name, but a woman was arrested during the Haiti earthquake recovery. She claimed to have been there to help out, but was arrested when it was found that she was trying to abduct children for sex trafficking. Her name showed up in the leaked Podesta e-mails years before this in a way that implied she was friendly with the Clintons.
5. There’s also a missing child case from Portugal with police sketches that seem to match John Podesta and Tony Podesta perfectly, around when Podesta’s e-mails revealed him to be out of town.
Add this to obvious coded language in the Podesta e-mails and there is a serious question as to why Hillary Clinton would be surrounded by so many people under reasonable suspicion of pedophilia or sex trafficking. Not only that, but “No Filter Neera,” as she’s called by those that have read the Podesta e-mails, pretty much confirmed in an e-mail about Hillary’s private e-mail server that she was involved in something illegal, likely involving the State Dept. as there would be no reason to keep incriminating e-mails on the same server as State Dept. e-mails otherwise.
The reason for it being called pizzagate was in reference to the coded language, where things like pizza showed up in strange places. As for Comet Ping Pong’s involvement, this was a tertiary thing that the left likes to focus on to try to discredit pizzagate. Comet Ping Pong’s owner has close ties to Hillary Clinton and, until recently, it used the known symbol pedophiles use for “boy’s love” (pedophiles into underage boys) as its logo.
The left insists that this is a conspiracy theory. Like Hillary being sick or the idea that the DNC was actively working to help the Hillary campaign at the expense of the Sanders campaign.
Not exactly the best track record, huh?
In conclusion, enjoy this video of Hillary Clinton having a seizure. Or making fun of seizures. The campaign claims the latter, and I really couldn’t care less either way. But it is kind of interesting that media outlets didn’t report on it either way, isn’t it?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QzCQg94oOmk
@ LeftAnswer:
Glad someone else here knows what they’re talking about. I have also read the Podesta emails released by Wikileaks; it is a disturbing experience once the pieces come together.
“5. There’s also a missing child case from Portugal with police sketches that seem to match John Podesta and Tony Podesta perfectly, around when Podesta’s e-mails revealed him to be out of town.”
I’m Portuguese. I remember the McCann case perfectly well. And here’s the facts about your statement:
“Theorists claimed John and Tony Podesta kidnapped Madeleine McCann using police sketches which were, in fact, two sketches of the same suspect taken from the descriptions of two eye witnesses. Furthermore, the claim that the brothers were in Portugal at the time of the kidnapping was sourced only to the conspiracy website Victurus Libertas, notable for, among other things, suggesting that the Queen of England was a reptilian alien.”
I don’t know which is more comic – this strip or the whole ongoing theory. The wikipedia detailed description of Pizzagate escalation was certainly good for a laugh – throw away the facts and cherry pick your delusions, huh? I despair of human race, but at least now I know how Trump got voted into power. I’m afraid the country that elected him might deserve him after all.
I *am* sorry that this place will shortly become a heated place to argue about these things, but as things are at the moment, the author probably knew this would happen. Comedy knows little tabboos, after all, and gladly takes the consequences.
@ wyzwon:
Future readers years from now? I just did this right now!
Also, from the latest responses, the story this is based on is almost an order of magnitude more absurd. Wow. Witch hunts are so 18th century.
Nothing worse than accurate delusions…
PLEASE no politics. I get enough of that at Cracked.com.
Oddly enough, I was not thinking Pizzagate, but Five Nights at Freddy’s.
For those who don’t know, Five Nights at Freddy’s is a survival horror game where you play a nighttime security guard at a Children’s Pizzeria. Your problem is that there are animatronic animals in the building with you that randomly wander about, and if they get in your office, well…
Now, one of the indicators that an animatronic is in your room is a slight sound of a crying child, which is then followed by a jumpscare that indicates you’ve lost the game.
@ Peter Piers:
Ah, Wikipedia. Wonderful source, especially when they cite a blatantly false article by the NYT designed specifically to discredit, not to determine truth.
You see, if they were to say that the claim showed up on that site, sure. That works. It’s also a weasel tactic designed to discredit rather than to actually determine the truth. Given the amount of false reports by the NYT recently, should we say that anything they report is proven false? Of course not. Merely because a claim shows up on a site that it not reliable does not mean that the claim itself is false.
To say that it is sourced solely from that site, however, is blatantly false. The individual in question is a source for a number of leaks, none of which have showed up first on that site. Now, I’m not going to say for certain one way or the other where Podesta was at the time. That is unconfirmed, though the source saying that he was in Portugal has been rather reliable in the past, but I don’t tend to trust anonymous sources absolutely. What we do know, however, was that he was out of the country (my original post said “out of town,” which is a lesson to never try to explain details when tired).
As for both sketches being of a single individual, this is based on the descriptions being similar and the sketches looking similar. From my understanding, the witnesses did not both see the suspect (or suspects) at the same time. It being one individual is a working theory/hypothesis by the police, not actually a confirmed fact.
This is the internet. If you’re going to play “my source is more credible than yours”, we’ll be here a lifetime. And frankly I have better things to do.
The town where Sandra & Woo takes place is much creepier than you’d expect at first glance…. o_o
How bad of a mindbreak is he going to have upon witnessing Sandra tied up?
I doubt Hillary’s running a sex trafficking ring, but it’s not really any more outlandish than the Russian conspiracy theories floating around.
And then Sandy’s rp scenario suddenly turns real…
I’m surprised no one’s called me out for still posting on the interwebs even though Dave supposedly killed me.
oh no! who could the girl be
Uhh, abducted children and a pizza restaurant?
This is a little more topical and political than you guys like to play it.
Plot twist:
Sandy South isn’t actually an alter ego of Sandra North, but actually her identical twin who was separated at birth!
Fluers wrote:
Well, it’s not more outlandish than the ‘watersports’ report that got circulated by buzzfeed/cnn. The point is whether those outlandish claims stay on small blogs – that’s just what we have to accept – or they get circulated by larger, ‘reputable’ media who are rightfully slammed for that.
Far worse is covering up & playing down terror attacks in Europe, simply because our almighty leaders & newspapers have fucked up big time & don’t like to admit it (Since it would cost votes & credibility).
Pizzagate? You opened the floodgates to hell Novil.
My 2 cents on PizzaGate. There IS in fact a lot of disturbing circumstantial evidence. There is a lot of bizarre language in the emails that have been used by pedos before if the FBI is to be believed, ditto for logos, ditto for some odd pictures that have surfaced, and odd taste in artwork as has been mentioned. It is not a conspiracy theory with no evidence.
On the flip side, it’s all circumstantial at best. No real smoking guns yet, and it might be this is just some poor taste in art a few other things that have created a false pattern.
So the Right needs to stop calling this thing as verified. And the Left needs to stop claiming there is n’t anything worth investigating here or that’s it’s ludicrous. There are multiple precedents for huge pedophile rings involving large numbers of people in positions of power before.
Guys Pizza gate was invented by the russians, Wiki Leaks is being hosted out of the kremlin and diebold election machines use Mini-bar keys.
I just wanted to read a comic about a girl and her talking racoon…
@ GnarlyDoug:
@ JacobSterling:
I actually forgot about something important that’s just been connected recently (though it was reported on by NBC ages ago): Hillary helped to cover up a “sexual misconduct” investigation (involving prostitution and pedophilia) in the State Dept. when she was Secretary of State.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HadGh0LcXxs
@ Peter Piers:
Yeah, we were never playing that game in the slightest. I completely debunked your claims with specific comments about how it reflected on the reliability of your source. I made no attempt to try to play that game, and saying I did is either ignorance or a blatant lie.
Could it be the missing Sandra North?!
@ LeftAnswer:
I sincerely hope anybody who reads your comment clicks that youtube link you gave after carefully reading your description of it. The contrast between what you say happens and what actually happens really helped me assess how much credibility your other remarks ought to get.
I choose to cause my own scandals for both sides to argue and be wrong about, thank you very much
How come this comic stays so surprisingly mature? I mean, at some point it should become just mature.
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=OxQd2Bitqic&feature=youtu.be
Some new reporting on issues surrounding the recent arrests of pedophilia and sex-trafficking in America.
Crestlinger wrote:
That was my thought, actually.
Pizzagate, in its particulars, was obviously wrong. Unfortunately, if you follow the news out of the UK, and observe just how many current and retired politicians on this side of “the pond” had accepted Epstein’s invitation to visit his pedophile fantasy island, (To say nothing of Dennis Hastert’s problems.) it’s not obviously wrong in general terms. Pedophile rings in high places actually is a real thing.
Sometimes I wonder if Pizzagate the specific fake story wasn’t put out there just to discredit the whole idea, as a protective measure.
It’s a witch! Flashlights off!
@ Brett Bellmore:
You aren’t wrong. Here’s some fresh reporting from PJW on that very topic. Vid came out today.
https://youtu.be/o1GQehNcZZw
LeftAnswer wrote:
@ GnarlyDoug:
@ Peter Piers: