Rejected strips

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Novil
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Rejected strips

Post by Novil » 08 Jan 2010, 21:57

Usually, strips that are based on a bad idea do not last long and the dialog is moved to the “Sandra and Woo Trash.odt” document. As an rare exception the script of this one was completed, though. It was rejected for being total out-of-character for Cloud, a castrated punchline that would only have really worked if he were half-Japanese, and being an in-joke that would have needed extensive explanation in the strip description:

[0127] Cheap excuses / Billige Ausreden

1. Panel:
  • Cloud is walking towards Larisa who is still sitting on the edge of the upper floor like in the previous strip. Larisa is currently scratching the belly of Woo who is lying on her lap. Woo is having his eyes closed. It should look really cute.
  • Cloud: Are you ready? Let’s go ho--
  • Cloud: Bist du fertig? Lass uns nach Hau--
2. Panel:
  • In this panel, the camera is focused on Cloud as the main character. He is acting like a silly, or rather “stupid” ;), little girl in a chibi manga. The following screenshot can be used as a model for that: (-->PIC<--).
  • Cloud: … OMG, you two are sooo kawaii, desu ne!?
  • Cloud: … OMG, ihr zwei seid sooo kawaii, desu ne!?
3. Panel:
  • Larisa and Woo are looking at each other with wide open eyes. Especially Larisa does not approve of Cloud’s stupidity in the last panel and her look telling stories.
4. Panel:
  • Larisa is pointing with his finger at Cloud, ordering Woo to attack him like a policeman would order a guard dog to catch a fleeing burglar. Cloud is running away in fear. His head is oriented straight ahead, but he’s looking at Larisa out of the corner of his eyes. Woo has just started chasing him, snarling at him with a grim face.
  • Larisa: <big>ATTACK, WOO! ATTACK THE WEEABOO!</big>
  • Larisa: <big>FASS, WOO! FASS DEN WEEABOO!</big>
  • Cloud: It’s not my fault! My parents screwed me up!
  • Cloud: Es ist nicht meine Schuld! Meine Eltern haben mich versaut!
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andromedakun
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Re: Rejected strips

Post by andromedakun » 11 Jan 2010, 14:31

This does sound a bit out of character for Cloud, but could still be a possibility if the scene was really cute :ugeek:

Also, we know his parents are Final Fantasy fans and gaming fans, maybe in his spare time he reads Shôjo manga :P

Andro
John da surfer
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Re: Rejected strips

Post by John da surfer » 03 Sep 2010, 15:25

Storries make us learn the character from phew words, it is important to choose them wisely. :ugeek:
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Novil
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Re: Rejected strips

Post by Novil » 06 Oct 2010, 20:38

Another one:

[0203] Political advertising / Wahlwerbung

General description:
  • We do not really have a character in our cast for this strip. It has to be a woman. Sandra is too young to walk alone at night. Ye Thuza would totally pwn any mugger who dares to put up with her. Jelena is just not the type of woman that would go “AAAAAAH!!!” considering the way you have drawn her. So we have to use a random young woman for this strip.
1. Panel:
  • A young attractive woman (around 20 years old) walks home alone at night. It is a shabby part of a big city. This and the following panels should be really dark. Maybe you can use a similar technique as in the 5th panel of (-->PIC<--).
  • Woman [thought bubble]: Brr, I don’t like to walk alone at night in this part of the city.
  • Woman [thought bubble]: Brr, ich lauf nachts nicht gerne allein durch diesen Teil der Stadt.
2. Panel:
  • The woman sees the shape of a man pointing a gun at her in the spotlight of a streetlight. Only parts of the man are visible. (See the next panel for more information.) The woman is terrified, maybe like this: (-->PIC<--)
  • Woman: AAAAAAH!!!
  • Woman: AAAAAAH!!!
3. Panel:
  • The poster is now fully visible and the woman recognizes that it is just an advertising poster for the next election. The Republican candidate should look like your average teabagger: (-->PIC<--). I especially “like” the design of the jacket. The candidate is pointing his gun at his target in the foreground like this guy: (-->PIC<--). Of course without holding a mobile phone at his ear. The target in the foreground is the word “OBAMACARE” with the “O” written like this: (-->PIC<--). The word has already been shot several times (illustrated by holes in the letters) and is now bleeding heavily. At the top of the poster there is a line “VOTE SPENCER”. I can add the “Vote Spencer” with a computer font, but the “OBAMACARE” has to be hand-drawn by you. Well, only partially. You could use a bold font for it, but you have to draw the holes and the blood. I think it would look good, if a letter, for example the “OBAMAC[A]RE” would already lie shot dead on the ground. Only a small part of the woman has to be visible in this panel.
  • Woman: Oh, it’s just a poster of the Republican candidate for the Senate election.
  • Woman: Oh, es ist nur ein Plakat für den Kandidat der Republikaner für die Senatswahl.
4. Panel:
  • Still looking at the poster, the woman is in panic again. To add a little variation her expression should now look maybe like this: (-->PIC<--).
  • Woman: AAAAAAH!!!
  • Woman: AAAAAAH!!!
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