“My name is Caesar Flickerman, and this is my co-host Claudius Templesmith. Together, we guide you through this year’s edition of the Hunger Games, featuring many of your favorite webcomic characters!”

“We’re four days into the Games and only five tributes remain after the two deaths yesterday: Rocky from District 3, Woo from District 4, Edmund from District 6, Red from District 8, and Lilith from District 11. Who’s your favorite now, Caesar?”

“Uhh, that’s a really tough question, Claudius. While Woo may have the best kill ratio so far, we also shouldn’t underestimate Lilith and Rocky. Lilith has years of extensive training on an elite academy behind her. Rocky, on the other hand, seems to have the right attitude to win the Games. One of these three will win, I’m sure. Red and Edmund don’t seem to have a chance.”

“All right. Then let’s see if you’re right.”

“It still seems a bit too early for that, Edmund…”

“Maybe Red is tougher than I thought. Fending away three other tributes isn’t an easy feat for such a small girl.”

“Yet another bold move by Woo! This little rascal is such a sly old dog! I don’t know about you, Claudius, but I’ve become a fan!”

“Lilith may have made it this far, but she just wasn’t tough enough to actually win the Games. She hasn’t killed a single other tribute until her death by Woo’s hands. You just don’t win the Games this way.”

“That’s it for today, folks. I wonder how many more days this year’s Hunger Games will last. So don’t forget to tune in tomorrow, because it could already be the last day!”

“Welcome to another day of this year’s edition of the Hunger Games, featuring many of your favorite webcomic characters!”

“But not many of them are left anymore, Caesar.”

“Yes, only seven if I counted correctly. Claudius, do you think Woo will continue his yesterday’s killing spree today?”

“Unlikely, Caesar. But let’s wait and see. Anything can happen in the arena!”

“A large group has formed, led by our current favorites Rocky and Woo. That doesn’t look good for poor Red and Phoebe.”

“They’re still so young and innocent. It’d hurt my heart to see them die.”

“District 8 and 12 must be sitting on the edges of their seats!”

“I’m surprised it took Rocky that long until his first kill. I almost placed a bet on him making his first kill right at the Cornucopia.”

“And he killed Guy with poison. He always looked more like the ‘axe murderer’ type to me.”

“The Games are always full of surprises, Claudius.”

“Yes, they are… Poor Phoebe could tell you a thing or two about it.”

“And yet another interesting day comes to an end. While District 10 and 12 mourn their dead tributes, we’re already super excited what will happen next in this year’s Hunger Games! So don’t forget to tune in tomorrow. Same place, same time!”

“Good evening. We’re Caesar Flickerman and Claudius Templesmith, your hosts for this year’s edition of the Hunger Games, featuring many of your favorite webcomic characters!”

“And we’re both still shocked how many lives yesterday’s arena event took. But our dear tributes are certainly even more shocked than we are. So let’s see how they’ll cope with this horrible, horrible bloodbath.”

“That’s not very nice, Woo.”

“But effective!”

“Indeed, Claudius, indeed.”

“Most tributes seem to ignore the feast this year. I expected a little more of this event, I have to say.”

“Yes, but Woo really seems to be on a killing spree. Yesterday Ship, then little Laurie, and now Commander Kitty. This mischevious little rascal takes no prisoners! Although he wasn’t among my favorites, we really have to take a closer look at him now.”

“Do you think Nin Wah had deeper feelings for Commander Kitty?”

“It almost looks like it, Claudius. What a tragic death…”

“Interesting. Woo does seem to have a conscience. Now let’s see if it plays out for Edmund that he kept Woo alive. If Woo’s able to pull himself together, he’ll make a hell of an ally.”

“Woo, from District 4, was responsible for all of today’s deaths in one form or the other. But the other tributes are just one lucky shot away from killing him. So while the odds seem to be in his favor, he’s still far away from winning the Games. So don’t forget to tune in tomorrow to watch the Games as they’re in their full swing!”

“I am Caesar Flickerman,…”

“… and I’m Claudius Templesmith, …

“… your hosts for this year’s edition of the Hunger Games, featuring many of your favorite webcomic characters!”

“Marigold and Indefinite Hiatus already lost their lives during the carnage at the Cornucopia. Now let’s see how the other tributes make it through the first night and the second day.”

“The mood still seems to be good among our tributes, but I’m sure this will change in the foreseeable future.”

“Most certainly, Caesar.”

“The first alliances are forming and… Wait, what is this…? Could it be? … Yes, an arena event! Do you remember the last Games with an arena event this early in the competition, Claudius?”

“No, Caesar. This may almost be a new record.”

“What a bloodpath…!”

“Incredible, Caesar, simply incredible! I’ve lost count, but it certainly feels like we’ve already lost half of our tributes. I think a minute of silence is appropriate in this dark hour for so many of our spectators.”

“…”

“Whoa! More than half of the tributes are already dead, including our favorite Sette. If the Games keep going like that, they’ll go down in history as the shortest Games ever!”

“Now let’s not think of the worst, Claudius. I’m sure we’ll still see a lot of interesting fights during the rest of the week. So tune in tomorrow to watch our broadcast of the next day of this year’s Hunger Games!”

(Click on the thumbnails to see the images in their full size.)

“What do you think of this year’s reaping, Caesar?”

“This is certainly an interesting roundup with all these characters from some of the best webcomics, neatly arranged by their publication date. No matter the outcome, the webcomic world won’t recover for many years from this year’s edition of the Hunger Games!”

“Who are the favorites in your opinion?”

“Well, Claudius, one thing is clear. Lilith Caillean would mop the floor with all the other tributes if the use of magic were allowed; even Duane Adelier doesn’t seem to be a match for her. But since the use of magic is punishable by death, the question which needs to be answered rather is the following: ‘Who has the right attitude to brutally kill the other characters without even batting an eye?’ And the answer to that can only be: Sette Frummagem, representing District 9!”

“So Sette is your favorite?”

“Yes,… but you never know. A lot of things can happen in the arena. We’ve seen it year after year after year. Take Marigold Heavenly Nostrils – after her sex change – for example. Nobody who’s read Phoebe and her Unicorn would ever believe he could even harm a butterfly. But when it comes to the crunch, I have no doubt he’d brutally stab cute little Laurie to death with his super sharp horn. And with Indefinite Hiatus from District 6 we also have a sleeper agent we mustn’t overlook!”

“Do you have anybody else on your list?”

“I’m really excited to see how Rocky Rickaby and Frank, the mentally most deranged characters, will do in the arena. Maybe they’ll be the first to go, maybe they’ll be the last men standing.”

“Thank you very much for your assessment, Caesar. I say: ‘Let the Games begin, and may the odds be ever in your favor!’”

“Indefinite Hiatus surely did’t make it long, Caesar. But I believe our spectators are actually very happy about her timely death. I don’t think there’s a single soul out there in the districts who was rooting for her.”

“You’re totally right, Claudius. Marigold, on the other hand, will certainly be dearly missed by many spectators. Now, I hope you’re as excited about the days to come as we are. So tune in tomorrow to see the rest of the first day of this year’s Hunger Games!”